Discipline + Environment = Success
Discipline + Environment = Success
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I am not a drinker, in fact I have never consumed alcohol at all. I realize that to some this might seem an unbelievable feat since the vast majority of people have at least tried drinking once, perhaps even a few times.
There are several reasons for this, in my faith tradition I was taught from a young age to abstain from consuming alcohol, and was also supplied healthy amounts of secular knowledge to support the idea that drinking was not good.
Furthermore, the environment which I grew up in was devoid of alcohol, it was never in our house and to the best of my knowledge never at any of my friends homes either. It wasn’t until I was sixteen and in my final year of secondary school in England that I attended a party where my peers were drinking.
It was a little strange to find myself immersed in an unfamiliar environment and thinking back, I am not certain I was aware prior to attending the party at Anna’s house that there would be alcohol.
But there I was, all my friends and people I did not know cracking open cans and popping lids off bottles. I honestly couldn’t tell you what was being drunk, I assume it was fairly tame stuff since we were all 16.
Although I was surrounded by others drinking, I was not tempted to deviate from my decision to abstain. Even when someone asked me to hold their drink for a moment I felt no desire to participate in what was very socially acceptable in that moment.
Since then I have had other occasions where I have been with peers who were drinking and would not have thought anything had I had chosen to drink too.
I believe that the reason I am able to easily resist the pull of alcohol, especially in social settings when drinking is the norm and even encouraged, is that I spend most of my life living in an environment where I do not have to be strong.
Almost every day of my life is spent in environments where alcohol is not present, discussed or drunk, which makes it very easy for me to maintain my beliefs and live the life I have chosen to pursue. Of course, when I am placed in situations where the opportunity to drink arises, I have to remain disciplined and self-controlled, but these I believe are only secondary mechanisms that keep me from alcohol consumption, the biggest reason I have succeeded at not consuming alcohol my entire life is because of the environments and relationships I have chosen to create and maintain.
I am certain, that if I started living in environments and spending more time with people who drink in places where they do, sooner or later my willpower and discipline would wane, I’d capitulate and consume. This is because our choices are greatly influenced by our environment and our relationships.
Willpower and discipline are essential components for being successful, but they are insufficient. This is why we so often see addicts relapsing after rehab and prisoners reoffending after prison. I do not doubt that many of the people that leave rehab and prison are changed and better and could go on to live productive and happy lives, however so often when they leave these facilities they reenter into the same environments and relationships that led them to rehab or prison.
Initially they have the willpower and determination to resist, but the effect of environment and the influence of relationships influences them until they find themselves succumbing to old ways of thinking and doing.
This teaches us that environment is an important part of being successful.
If we have been unsuccessful in getting healthier, or improving our mental health, or becoming more financially free or creating robust relationships or staying spiritually strong, it might be time to consider your current environments and curate new ones that make achieving your goals and potential more likely. Even the best and most determined people will likely fail in the wrong environment.
We may not be able to control all aspects of the environments in which we live, but there is so much we can change and alter, especially within our homes and the relationships we get to choose. Maybe it’s moving the television from the bedroom to create an environment more conducive for connection and conversation with your spouse, or making fruit more obviously positioned in your home and eliminating junk foods.
I think I will always be a firm believer in the necessity of discipline, consistency, and willpower in our becoming successful, but when we couple these qualities with more optimal environments we dramatically improve our ability to succeed in the most important areas of our lives such as our relationships, our physical and mental health, our finances and our spiritual strength.
I hope this helps to make life better,
All the best,
Matthew